Screw the Highlights. I need to rant.

Second, I am one of those who actually ain’t angry about the recent price gouges for the Yankee games.  I understand you are business men as well as ball club owners, and the objective of business men is to make money.  I also understand that the Yankees are a huge draw, it’s not every day you can increase both ticket prices and sales by 300% (which by the way equals about 1.7 million extra per game and that’s before food, alcohol, and merchandise sales).  Here’s my problem, I don’t care what it costs to get the Rockies into the playoffs and I imagine most fans agree with me.  I know we won’t pay $50 per game to sit in the nosebleeds but I’d drop $20 every other week to see a team that could win the pennant.  Point being, you gouge us, you owe us, and here’s what I want:  Holliday and Francis signed to long term contracts.  If in 3 years time, both Matt and Jeff find themselves on the AL east coast, I will remember the week you proved you like money for yourself more than pride for your fans.

Brian Fuentes (also pay attention Clint Hurdle):  If you didn’t pick this up over the last 4 blown saves: Lay Off The Change Up To Right Handed Batters!  It doesn’t take an expert to notice all the righties everyone is parading to the plate in the ninth.  It does take an expert (like myself) to know how to beat them.  If they crowd the plate, sliders and curve balls ‘til they have two strikes and then a fastball at the hands to K or fly out.  If they are standing off, fastball high outside corner, fastball high outside corner, curveball low ball, curve ball low strike.  You’ll either K or ground out strait to SS.  Note: Never throw a slider to a righty anytime except the first pitch of an at bat.  Your slider just moves too far and you hit to batsmen, so best to do that when they have no strikes rather than two strikes.  Further Note:  Your change up has apparently been made.  Don’t use that against righties as they already see your delivery to well.  Hurdle, 4 blown saves has hurt this kid’s confidence. Sit him down for 10-14 days, or let him play the set-up 8^th.  Get his confidence back before you ruin him. 

All Star selection committee:  Fuentes blows 4 straight saves and is an All Star, and Francis, who shuts down 7 out 9 teams including two 7 inning shutouts, isn’t?  If Barry Bonds starts over Matt Holliday, it will prove why America thinks this game is a joke.  I predict super low ratings for this year’s All-Star Game.

Also, I don’t know how Fuentes will react to pitching in the all star game, bad players don’t make it.  If he shuts down the AL in his inning it might fix him right there.  If he gets killed, there might be no saving him.  Of course, it may have no effect whatsoever, I’m just speculating since I’ve never seen a pitch ruin his reputation and still make the game. 

Jason Hirsh:  If your slider ain’t moving so far and so hard to the left it’s pissing off Rush Limbaugh, then you ain’t worth a dime in the Majors.  Fix it.

LeTroy Hawkins: Location, Location, Location.  If you can throw 125 mph, but it always ends up in the center of the plate at the belt, you get taken yard every time.  Nip those corners, or find a new job.

Rockies defense: Fundamentals.  Get back to little league if you have to.  Field, set, throw, in that order.  And when catching, glove hand in front of you, upright or tilted in.  Never sidearm a catch, Baker and Atkins.  Errors are unacceptable, and cost us 3 of the games on this road trip.

The FOX Network:  F*** you FOX Sports.  You ruined a perfectly good Saturday afternoon for me.  Let me paint the picture.  The Colorado at Houston game 3, Francis vs. Jennings.  A game I had been waiting to see all season, due to air nationally on FOX, declined, two days early in favor of Brewers at Cubs.  I understand Rocks at Stros ain’t exactly national drama.  So I tune in radio to listen to the pregame at game time and it had been rescheduled for 5:00.  Interferes with schedule, but I can hang.  I reschedule my day and turn on FSN at 5:00 and they’re showing a god damn Fenway puff piece.  I want to see my old favorite pitcher and my new favorite pitcher duel, instead I get David Ortiz and Manny Ramirez, two players I don’t care about in a city I don’t care about.  And for the record, if it had been a Yankees piece, I would have been equally pissed off.  I guess the audience in Colorado and Texas isn’t big enough to take a game you’re covering anyway and move it the network that usually shows it.  Or maybe the production guy who got the day off and then had to come back got lazy and bitched that he had to do his job.  Unless you scalp him and send it to me you screwed me and all the Rocks and Stros fans a game we all wanted to see. Up Yours FOX Sports! Your football coverage sucks too.

Atkins: Get back to working counts.  You’re a much better hitter when you work counts.

Todd Helton: WTF?  Where’d the hitting go?  Batting Average of .167 over the road trip?  In Todd’s defense, his OBP over the road trip was .347 because everyone walks him, but still, .167?  This could be the biggest reason for the losing streak.  I don’t know what’s wrong but this must change or the season is as good as over, and Todd won’t be traded to contender.  Perhaps you should start swinging at the first pitch, it seems to be the only good pitch opponents give you as they still fear you apparently.

Matt Holiday: Stop swinging at the first pitch.  For a while, let it go by three out a fourth time.  Just until pitchers forget about your killer instinct.  Speaking of forgetting things, did you forget how hit sliders?  Remember, fast.

Clint Hurdle:  What are you doing to the lineup?  We got a 16 game straight stretch, so resting players on the off series is imperative.  That means the starters play in Chicago!  If Kaz is hitting, what the hell is Carroll playing every other day for?  Further, you get too deep into your bench, and too shallow into your bullpen.  If a pitcher doesn’t have it, and he’s letting runners get to third in consecutive innings, pull him.  He’s obviously going to screw up big sooner or later.  And don’t let the point in the lineup influence whether you leave him in on not.  I counted 4 times this road trip you left the bad pitcher in because you didn’t want to use a bullpen pitcher for two outs and then pull him.  Let the bullpen hit.  Sacrificing one out to stop one run is a worthwhile trade.

My friend, the incredible Ian, commented to me that the reason he believes Clint has a job is because he looks good and speaks well, because the Rockies, whose low payroll prevents them from contending, don’t need a skilled manager; they need a politician to make it seem okay afterward.  I’m not ready to believe this yet, but it certainly does fit the facts.  Although if this is true, he sure screwed up with this: Clint, where do you get off telling reporters that “You don’t know baseball unless you’ve played in the Majors”?.  I’m not even gonna dignify that by naming all the coaches, scouts, managers, trainers, commentators, analysts, and owners who “don’t know baseball”.  Let me ask you something Clint, most umpires didn’t make the big league. Does blue not know baseball? 

To Hurdle’s credit, Iannetta is finally hitting, which is a good thing, it just cost us 5 road games.

Lastly, let me tell you a little about myself.  Most people feel better having released outrage into world.  Not me.  This is more a rehearsal than a release.  While the norm is to feel unburdened, my problems and gripes only go away when they are fixed.  And thus, I shall remain angry and unsatisfied until all these things are fixed.  I suspect only some will be fixed while others (bad owner) I will have to learn to live with.  One last thing, 1-9 stretches are absolutely beyond forgivable.  I think many things led to it, so many things must be fixed.  If you got cocky, humble up; if you got lazy, work harder; if you got unlucky, start playing poker and use up the bad karma before you come to the ballpark; but if you keep losing, you are in danger of becoming unconfident.  The only cure for that is relocation.